so for my 17th birthday, I asked for a kindle paperwhite because I had started taking reading a tad bit seriously again, and thought it was a good way to keep my books in one compact device. the fact that you have to then buy individual books to read was sort of annoying but hey, at least they were cheaper than their physical counterparts. I had the kindle for a while and took it with me on holiday and even used it for college. I bought and read Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami, When Will There Be Good News? by Kate Atkinson, Carry On by Rainbow Rowell and Aristotle and Dante Discover The Secrets of The Universe by Benjamin Alire Saenz. alongside these, I downloaded a number of samples for other books that I had on my TBR or just caught my interest.
but I also began missing the feel of physical books, continuing to buy more of those than try to stick purely to an e-reader.
the kindle accompanied me when I started university and into my second year until COVID-19 hit and I had to return home. it wasn’t until August 2020 that I was able to clear out my dorm room. but one thing was definitely off when I began searching for my kindle, thinking it must be with all my other belongings that were finally back in my bedroom at home. then I tried to remember where I last saw it and couldn’t think of anywhere I may have left it… it was literally nowhere to be found. so then began a period of mourning for my kindle paperwhite, lost somewhere out there.
there was a brief time when I considered buying a new kindle in secret as no one else knew about the fact that my original was lost. but since they cost quite a lot, I refrained and decided to save up more money first. I pretty much had fully given up at this point.
but in 2022, something incredible happened…
I noticed a message from someone on Instagram: it was a girl who was now living in my previous dorm room and while searching for her AirPods… she had found my kindle!!!! there was also a notebook and a note from a friend/flatmate from first year that was also left behind and the latter having my name helped her find me :’)) the amount of gratitude I have towards this girl is still grand. I expressed this gratitude and with help from another friend, the kindle, notebook and post-it note made their way back into my arms through the post ❤
I have been guarding the kindle immensely since so as not to lose it again. for a brief time though, I didn’t feel like reading because I wasn’t bothered to spend more money on e-books again. but this summer, I went on holiday with my family and some family friends and it coincided with the release of ‘Red, White & Royal Blue’ on Amazon Prime. since the novel was on my TBR for some time and I preferred to read it before watching the film, I caved in £4.99 to finally read it on my kindle. the amazing part? I was immersed into reading once more, wanting to keep turning the page and into the next chapters, a feeling I had not had much over the last few years 🙂 I even crocheted a sleeve for my kindle to make it extra special and protected.
these days, I see reels on my Instagram explore page of people buying and/or decorating their own kindles. there are stickers, a clear case and pop sockets being used on almost all of them. so the kindle paperwhite has become part of a lot of people’s lives again. mine was through a miracle and I’m glad I’m re-entering this kindle girl era.
First things first, a slightly late happy new year! Now, I was wondering on how to kick-start the new year on this blog and quickly thought of summarising all the films I was able to watch in 2022. So I have compiled the list below with their star ratings out of 5 🙂
⭐ = one star / 💫 = half-star / [film] = rewatched
january:
The Things You Think I’m Thinking (2017) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐💫
tick, tick…BOOM! (2021) – ⭐⭐⭐
The Power of The Dog (2021) – ⭐⭐
A Trip to The Moon (1902) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Steamboat Willie (1928) – ⭐⭐⭐
Sleeping Beauty (1959) – ⭐⭐⭐💫
Iron Man 2 (2010) – ⭐⭐💫
Thor (2011) – ⭐⭐💫
Sherlock, Jr. (1924) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Martha Marcy May Marlene (2011) – ⭐⭐⭐💫
Thor: The Dark World (2013) – ⭐
Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Bro Daddy (2022) – ⭐⭐💫
february:
Little Women (2019) – ⭐⭐⭐💫
Princess Mononoke (1997) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Atonement (2007 – ⭐⭐⭐💫
Marie Antoinette (2006) – ⭐⭐⭐💫
Guardians of The Galaxy (2014) – ⭐⭐⭐💫
Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015) – ⭐⭐⭐
Guardians of The Galaxy Vol. 2 (2017) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐
march:
Black Panther (2018) – ⭐⭐⭐💫
Captain Marvel (2019) – ⭐⭐💫
Black Widow (2021) – ⭐⭐
Eternals (2021) – ⭐⭐💫
The Batman (2022) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
The Lighthouse (2019) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐💫
Blow (2001) – ⭐⭐⭐
The Princess and The Frog (2009) – ⭐⭐⭐💫
West Side Story (2021) – ⭐⭐⭐
Nightmare Alley (2021) – ⭐⭐💫
Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind (2004) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Don’t Look Up (2021) – ⭐⭐
The Eyes of Tammy Faye (2021) – ⭐⭐
april:
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri (2017) – ⭐⭐⭐💫
Joy (2015) – ⭐
Hidden Figures (2016) – ⭐⭐⭐
Boys Don’t Cry (1999) – ⭐⭐💫
Quills (2000) – ⭐💫
The Good Son (1993) – ⭐💫
The Help (2011) – ⭐⭐⭐💫
The Fly (1986) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐
Can You Ever Forgive Me? (2018) – ⭐⭐
Lady and The Tramp (1955) – ⭐⭐⭐
Walk The Line (2005) – ⭐⭐⭐
American Murder: The Family Next Door (2020)
Brothers (2009) – ⭐⭐⭐
may:
A Night in The Show (1915) – ⭐⭐💫
Spider-Man (2002) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Silver Linings Playbook (2012) – ⭐⭐⭐
Tuck Everlasting (2002) – ⭐⭐⭐
Edward Scissorhands (1990) – ⭐⭐⭐⭐💫
june:
She’s The Man (2006) – ⭐⭐⭐💫
Ammonite (2020) – ⭐
RRR (2022) – ⭐⭐⭐
Laughing Gas (1914) – ⭐⭐⭐
july:
Doctor Strange In The Multiverse of Madness (2022) – ⭐⭐
A lot of us have a subscription to whichever of the streaming services that exist now and binge as many series as we like. It’s an ingrained part of our contemporary culture and I feel its legacy will last despite its recent shortcomings. While eating breakfast, lunch or dinner, I go to Netflix or Amazon Prime on my TV or laptop and search through their catalogue for an intriguing series to watch. Sometimes they can be a miss, but others really make my entire life.
Baby (2018-2020)
c: Netflix
platform: Netflix country: Italy language: Italian
Based on a true case, Baby follows Chiara Altieri (Benedetta Porcaroli) and Ludovica ‘Ludo’ Storti (Alice Pagani), two teenage girls at the affluent school Collodi in Rome who begin to lead double lives in prostitution. The subject matter is serious and initially, I was questioning how the series truly dealt with the topic. It should be a series that was average at best and one I disliked, considering the short length, lack of development in characters and narrative. Side plots follow other characters:
Damiano Younes (Riccardo Mandolini) – a newly transferred student, son of a diplomat and becomes involved with Chiara
Niccolo Govender Rossi (Lorenzo Zurzolo) – his messy personal life involves Chiara and track coach Monica, Damiano’s step-mother
Camilla Govender Rossi (Chabeli Sastre Gonzalez) – Niccolo’s sister and Chiara’s slowly estranging best friend
FabioFedelli (Brando Pacitto) – Chiara and Camilla’s best friend who deals with his sexuality
Brando De Sanctis (Mirko Trovato) – Niccolo’s best friend, school bully at Collodi and has an identity crisis
Claudio Fiorenzi/’Fiore’ (Giuseppe Maggio) – A shady businessman and eventually Ludo and Chiara’s pimp
Due to early controversy, the first season was cut from eight to six episodes, a choice which remained for the next two seasons. Perhaps this decision let the series down in terms of there being little development that was convincingly moving the story forward. I want to point out that some aspects of representing the protagonists’ venture into a dangerous world should’ve been more carefully done. But over the course of 3 seasons, I found the series to be mature and morally sound with characters facing consequences for their actions, including legal repercussions. The whole prostitution arc also shows how Chiara and Ludo both become entangled with it and how it affects them individually, leading to realisations of manipulation and addiction. The tone is dark, the cinematography is sleek and the music is a genre I’ve not heard elsewhere.
‘Baby’ proved to be something different and still remains one of the most unique shows I’ve seen. It was a tough watch at times and evoked some stronger emotions by the series’ conclusion.
A Mexican teen drama series, ‘Control Z’ follows a group of students at the National College who become victims of a mysterious hacker:
Isabela de la Fuente (Zión Moreno) – a popular girl at the school who is outed as transgender
Pablo García (Andrés Baida) – Isabela’s boyfriend who is revealed to be having an affair with another (mysterious) female classmate
Gerardo ‘Gerry’ Granda (Patricio Gallardo) – a tough and aggressive bully exposed for watching gay pr0n
Alejandra ‘Alex’ Salomone (Samantha Acuña) – an openly lesbian student who’s relationship with her biology teacher is exposed
Raúl León (Yankel Stevan) – the son of wealthy parents, his father is revealed to be a fraud
Natalia Alexander (Macarena García Romero) – once the organiser of a school fundraiser, only to be exposed as keeping the money for herself to buy luxury items
Once their secrets are revealed, several troubles in their relationships ensue. The protagonist Sofía ‘Sofí’ Herrera (Ana Valeria Becerril) is a girl with exceptional observation skills and attempts to discover the hacker’s identity with the help of new student and friend Javier Williams (Michael Ronda). After ‘Baby’ had officially ended and I was searching for similar shows, some people had recommended this one on Reddit. The story and characters had some depth to them and figuring out the hacker’s identity and motivation was intriguing. As the series lasted three seasons, the story remained consistent with a new problem faced by the characters each time, courtesy of the hacker.
There were some loose ends like ‘Baby’ had and some moments which, admittedly, were more weird than anything. But it was still a fun series to follow with a creative premise.
Young Royals (2021-present)
c: Netflix / IMDb
platform: Netflix country: Sweden language: Swedish
Another teen/young adult series, ‘Young Royals’ is one I regret putting off watching for no particular reason. The series follows Prince Wilhelm (Edvin Ryding), the youngest son of the Swedish Royal Family, who transfers to Hillerska Academy after a controversy. There, he meets Simon Eriksson (Omar Rudberg), a fellow student and chorister for the school and a rocky but romantic relationship develops. We also meet the supporting characters:
August Horn (Malte Gårdinger) – Wille’s 2nd cousin tasked with helping him settle down at the academy
Felice Ehrencrona (Nikita Uggla) – a popular girl at Hillerska and childhood friend of Wilhelm
Sara Eriksson (Frida Argento) – Simon’s sister who struggles with Asperger’s and ADHD
On a surface level, the series can come across as simple and perhaps even fan-fictionesque. But there’s so much I appreciate about ‘Young Royals’ as it exceeds beyond just another teen/young adult romantic drama.
Firstly, the fact that they allow the actors/characters to keep acne and other blemishes adolescents can have. As someone who suffered from really bad acne as a teenager, it was nice to see the show keep it real. The approach to the idea of royalty, something that is often considered very traditional, dealing with LGBTQIA+ themes is careful and is an interesting commentary, having me on the brink of tears at times. It led to the realisation that this is a topic that is relevant and how much we need to reconsider what is ‘traditional’ and ‘right’. With a third and final season confirmed, I’m hopeful in seeing how Wilhelm and Simon‘s story ends ❤
Heartstopper (2022-present)
c: Netflix
platform: Netflix country: United Kingdom language: English
I was familiar with the graphic novels by Alice Oseman, thanks to one of my best friends and some booktubers. Once the series hit Netflix, I made the decision to watch it out of curiosity because there were already such great reviews of the source material. ‘Heartstopper’ might be one of the most wholesome series I’ve ever seen. It follows Charlie Spring (Joe Locke), a recently outed boy who is gay, and Nick Nelson (Kit Connor), a popular rugby player and fellow classmate at Truham Grammar School, and the start of a blossoming relationship between them. The series is heart-warming in examining what it means to be comfortable with your sexuality and the platonic love found in friendships as well. ‘Heartstopper’ had instances which had me tearing up too, from the sad to the tender and endearing. The supporting characters are all loveable in their own right:
Tao Xu (William Gao) – One of Charlie’s best friends, a cinephile (like me!)
Elle Argent (Yasmin Finney) – Charlie and Tao’s friend who transfers to the local girls school, Higgs, after coming out as transgender
Isaac Henderson (Tobie Donovan) – Another best friend of Charlie, Tao and Elle who is often quiet and seen reading books
Tara Jones (Corinna Brown) – One of Elle’s new friends at Higgs
Darcy Olsson (Kizzy Edgell) – Tara’s girlfriend who also befriends Elle at Higgs
When I saw the news that this series has also been renewed (not just for a second season but a third too!), I was so so happy :’)
Invincible (2021-present)
c: Amazon Prime
platform: Amazon Prime country: United States language: English
For anyone who knows me personally, or read one of my previous blog entries, you will know how much I LOVE ‘Invincible’. I’m very much into superhero media and have been since I was a little girl. But recently, it appears that there are too many misses than hits in the genre from my observations. I haven’t seen many adult animated series and have not seen any animated superhero shows in a long time. A true breath of fresh air, ‘Invincible’ really proved to be something phenomenal.
The series follows Mark Grayson (Steven Yeun), a teenager who’s father is the greatest superhero on Earth, Omni-Man (J.K. Simmons), and begins to develop powers of his own. While under his father’s tutelage, he encounters various other heroes as enemies wreak havoc on the planet and Mark’s values and relationships are put to the test.
The credit must go to the original comics first and foremost, though. A subversive, grounded, gritty take on superheroes while paying homage to its classic origins, the show has been an adventure so far. The talented ensemble voice cast is fantastic and the score composed by John Paesano is epic. I’m eagerly awaiting the second season, since I have been dealing with some type of withdrawal since season one ended. If new reports are correct, however, it will arrive sometime in 2023!
The Boys (2019-present)
c: Amazon Prime
platform: Amazon Prime country: United States language: English
Another subversive, dark, gritty addition to the new wave of superhero shows, ‘The Boys’ also plays with superhero tropes and hypothetical scenarios with the real world to show how…well, (using a word echoed in the series) ‘diabolical’ it would be. Superheroes are public figures, known as ‘Supes’ and work for Vought International, a corporation which promotes them. Hughie Campbell Jr. (Jack Quaid) is recruited into The Boys, a vigilante group working against Supes, by William ‘Billy’ Butcher (Karl Urban) after his girlfriend is killed by the Supe A-Train (Jessie T. Usher). Other members of The Boys include the group’s organiser Marvin/’Mother’s Milk’ (Laz Alonso), arms trafficker Frenchie (Tomer Capon) and Kimiko (Karen Fukuhara), a mute woman who was subject to experimentation and possesses powers of her own. Butcher, in particular, has a personal vendetta against Homelander (Anthony Starr), the most famous and powerful superhero of them all. Homelander, A-Train, along with Queen Maeve (Dominique McElligot), The Deep (Chase Crawford), Black Noir (Nathan Mitchell), Translucent (Alex Hassell) and newest member Starlight (Erin Moriarty) form The Seven, the primary superhero group from Vought and a reference to DC’s Justice League.
There is so much nuance to the characters and the world they inhibit, making us rethink if we really need superheroes. They could be part of a greedy corporation. There are repercussions of damage caused to towns/cities and even people’s psyche during heroic pursuits. The dangers of people with immense power shifting to the wrong side of the moral compass is terrifying. But as a sucker for vigilante characters, The Boys as the group to challenge the status quo of this world is exhilarating. Homelander has become one of my favourite villains and Anthony Starr deserves an Emmy. I do feel the third season was *slightly* underwhelming in a few areas. But nonetheless, I’ve enjoyed the humour, violence, themes and character arcs and I’m curious to see season four.
To Be Continued..?
These are the few web series which are currently among my favourites. I can only hope that those still ongoing will continue to remain top-tier in quality and therefore, remain in my heart. I’m glad that these platforms have made the wise decisions to renew them as I’m certainly not done enjoying these shows just yet. Perhaps there will be more to add to the list in the future and I will be sure to write an updated list if feelings change or any new series catch my attention 🙂
A bullet journal is a planning system created by Ryder Carroll as an alternative system to the usual planner. His video on how to bullet journal was uploaded to YouTube in 2015 and the phenomenon grew exponentially. I’m sure most of us have heard the term to some degree.
Carroll’s first video on the bullet journal system / channel: Ryder Carroll
The bullet journal video which gained popularity and led to the rise in bullet journaling / channel: Bullet Journal
Social media sites such as Instagram and Tumblr saw a rise in what is dubbed the “study community” or colloquially “studyblr/studygram”, portmanteaus of ‘study’ + ‘tumblr’/’instagram’. This new space that I found became a new home and had a large presence of bullet journals. The bullet journal in particular quickly became the common and preferred format of planning for students and naturally, I decided to pick up this system.
Bullet journal spreads usually feature the following:
Monthly title page
Calendar
Goal list
Weekly spreads with space to add tasks
Yearly/monthly/future logs
Other optional additions are playlists, stickers, washi tape and photos to name a few.
I bought a Leuchtturm 1917 dotted journal, some Tombow dual brush pens and washi tape and went on with it. The practice became on and off until eventually, I officially gave up in 2019. The sentimental part of me feels sad to have let go of it. But the rational part of me is so relieved.
the pressure of perfectionism
The problem was the overwhelming task bullet journaling became. The system is supposed to be a solution to our disorganisation and in Carroll’s videos, the simplicity of the system is obvious. However, the blank canvas of Carroll’s style leads to opportunities in designing the appearance of your bullet journal, leading the way to the “aesthetics” problem. On Tumblr, I noticed that the bullet journal spreads posted by various users were often artistic. Stickers, washi tape and brush pen calligraphy made these pages visually stunning. While these are wonderful to look at and appreciate, subconsciously, we build the notion of what is to be expected from keeping a bullet journal.
When I began bullet journaling, I had already forayed into the studyblr community and felt much more confident in organising my academic life, something which I previously struggled with. But then came the unspoken rule of being aesthetic. Aesthetics have become incredibly popular and are arguably a core part of everyone’s identities in the contemporary world. I myself love the concept of aesthetics and apply it as part of my own identity. But it proved to be an intensely stressful exercise for a lot of us in the study community. In 2017, I was ready to post my own spread. A muted weekly spread in pastel colours with minimalist pictures made its way to becoming liked by over 2,000 users. It was a delightful feeling seeing how many people liked how aesthetic it is. What I didn’t realise is that was precisely the superficial mindset that would lead to my quitting.
the bullet journal spread that received over 2k notes / tumblr
Bullet journaling became a chore and I would create spreads for the new month and become dissatisfied with its appearance. There was too much effort for my slow and easily exhausted brain. They weren’t ‘aesthetic’ enough and wouldn’t receive social media likes.
Leading on from the aesthetic dilemma, the time spent on constructing a double-paged spread results in being side-tracked from a bullet journal’s purpose. From my own experience, I can recall spending an awful amount of time figuring out what type of weekly format to use, which colours I wanted, what materials would look the nicest and finding pictures to print and glue onto the pages. Writing down the tasks would be the last thing I considered.
In hopes of becoming more productive, bullet journals became a popular solution for students and those who work. When the attention deviates from the process of organising your life, the system is made redundant.
Of course, there are people who succeed with their productivity and be creative visually using a bullet journal. AmandaRachLee, a popular creator online who’s known for her bullet journal videos on YouTube, is one that comes to mind. Her monthly upload schedule always features setting up her spreads for the new month. As an artist, her talent is evident in the various themes she incorporates. But her consistency in utilising the system to her benefit is also clear. Bullet journal users such as Amanda have found a method which works for them. However, that doesn’t mean this system is universal. Some may be quick to adopt it, others like myself will go through that annoying cycle instead.
Bullet journaling also turned out to be an enemy to my bank account. Especially since I struggled with the extra materials in an attempt to be artistic, these products led to a series of issues.
One of the earliest stationery shops I came across from the studyblr community is KawaiiPenShop. Some top creators would use their stationery products and would also offer a 10% discount if customers used their affiliate code. There was also an introduction to Muji and their products, a popular Japanese brand. The stationery in question would range from pastel-coloured washi tape (a type of tape made from rice paper), brush pens, stickers and gel pens. Additionally, the notebooks and journals were among a few noted brands. Moleskine and Leuchtturm were the top names in notebook brands while some who continued to use planners, owned a MosseryCo planner. The appeal of the latter was the personalisation of having your name on the front cover.
During the initial phase of bullet journaling, I bought the washi tape and stickers from KawaiiPenShop and a pack of Tombow dual brush pens and a Leuchtturm 1917 dotted journal from Amazon. While I cannot remember the grand total from the top of my head, it all cost a tad bit too much. As well as the price points being just beyond reach, I realised that I could not afford to continue spending money buying a new batch of stationery once the previous was either completed/used up.
The other glaring problem I’ve come to realise is the amount of waste being produced. In more recent times, I’ve become more eco-conscious as the environment and climate of our planet is on the ropes and we all need to do much better to save it. The journals I owned have several empty pages towards the end due to creative blocks. Some existing pages do not feature any tasks or remain unfinished. If I was unsatisfied with a spread, I would attempt to redo the ‘mistakes’, ruining the quality of the paper in the process or fully tearing the pages out and discarding them.
Waste does appear to be an issue across the study community. Whether it is leaving journals unfinished or buying far too many to find proper use for all of them, I can say that I almost shudder recalling the wasteful person I was when I tried bullet journaling.
so what now?
Since I abandoned bullet journaling, I did not move to a new system per se. It took a little bit of time to find something which worked for me. I was gifted a yearly planner on my 21st birthday which I managed to use well. Afterwards, I felt that planners would raise the waste issue again so I didn’t continue with this format.
Eventually, I began using Notion. This app kept appearing amongst students and other creators on YouTube and the design and structure was definitely appealing. So, after much contemplation, Notion quickly became a top database for my life overall. Google Calendar also proved to be helpful in planning out tasks across the week. Both apps being digital and providing freedom to customise solved many of the issues I had with bullet journaling: there is no waste, the apps are free to use and easily customisable if I wish to edit my style.
Those who have been successfully using a bullet journal, fair play to you. For myself, I have left for (what I believe are) greener pastures. The important thing, overall, is to figure out what type of system to adopt and utilise because it works for YOU. Don’t settle for a system because it is the popular and trendy thing to do.
So, I’m sure many of us are individuals who have tried to boost our productivity at least a couple of times. Unfortunately, for some of us, we struggle and land back in our old habits. Now, there’s nothing wrong with that because everyone goes through life differently and certain factors are beyond our control. I know for myself, I’ve been held back a lot because of mental health and fatigue and I often find myself starting something and giving up after a few days. But I try, I guess. This list is essentially just different applications and websites that have helped to maintain at least a minimal stream of productivity as well as helping me to start taking care of myself.
Notion
Notion is a site/application that I came across around last year (I think) and it’s been quite life-changing. Notion is an outlet to be able to organise your entire life from work, studying, general tasks and events and so on. The application is a blank canvas upon which you can add various elements such as calendars, tables, other widgets and there is a great freedom for customisation! You can add images, gifs and change headers sizes, fonts and colours. Below are some Notion tours that’ll give you an idea of how Notion works and how much you can customize it according to your life! Notion also has a feature where you can duplicate templates by other users if the link is provided by them. This can help if you’re unsure of how to structure your Notion ~ If you’re a student, you can use your school/college/uni email to get the pro plan for free!
Alexandra (twirlingpages) made a video which is when I decided to start using Notion myself!
Joel’s Notion is very stunning so I had to embed his tour :O
The two downsides I’ve heard of and come across is that for more features and larger file sizes, you need to switch to a paid subscription and Notion isn’t fully secure in terms of your data, a problem highlighted by harshibar on YouTube. I would highly recommend that you don’t use Notion for very private and personal information, e.g. bank details, locations/addresses, school/college/university IDs, passwords, journal entries with very private info etc.
Obsidian
Obsidian is a note-taking software which saves your data only on your PC without putting anything into a cloud. The text is plain text Markdown so you can add asterisks to make words/sentences bold and dashes to make them italic etc. You create vaults which are saved to your PC and within each vault, you can create folders and individual note pages. I came across this application through harshibar as she presented it as a secure-alternative for Notion. I prefer Obsidian to Word because of it’s smoother and nicer UI and it makes me want to write for once. But since Word is commonly used and preferred when I submit articles, I just copy and paste from Obsidian to Word. The writing experience and better security is what makes Obsidian appealing for me to use. Personally, I still don’t keep anything private in Obsidian either but rest-assured it’s more secure.
Google Calendar
A feature easily accessible if you have a Google account, Google Calendar is something that I wish I had started using sooner. It’s relatively straight-forward. You’re able to:
create individual calendars which can be colour-coded and labelled, e.g. “Birthdays”, “Work”
set the duration of the task
view the calendar in yearly, monthly, weekly and daily formats
get alerts before a task or event occurs to remind you (if you’re calendar is synced with your phone)! You can also set when you want to receive alerts, e.g. 30 minutes before the task/event
As someone who used to bullet journal and grew tired and annoyed with the system for a few reasons, Google Calendar has been a much more easier and quicker planner system to sort out my days and weeks.
Anyusha has a great video with lots of details and can show you how to exactly set-up your Google Calendar.
Idenati
Idenati is a site which allows you to keep and organise the websites you often use in the form of separate tiles. You can sort them by adding tags/categories and star them to add to your favourites so you can filter through them if you wish. I’ve set up Idenati as the first page that appears when I start up Chrome so I can easily find where I want to go and not have to type. Your usernames for each website can also be recorded in order to not forget. The downside is that the free version has a maximum of 20 tiles and for unlimited tiles, you’ll need to have a paid subscription. Idenati also has a feature for each tile to store your passwords for websites. I’m not sure how secure the site is so I haven’t recorded any of mine and I’d probably recommend you don’t too. The site is just great for my daily Chrome use to easily find my top and prioritised websites.
What my current Idenati set-up looks like!
coffeelings
coffeelings is a cute Chrome extension that’s basically a mood tracker. When you click on the extension, you’ll see an option to choose from 5 different moods: amazing, ok, tired, sad and stressed. The moods then appear on a yearly chart to show how you’ve been feeling across the year. You can also type how you feel into the little box just below the coffee cup and mood options!
A cute design and easy tracking of your daily mood 🙂
So those are the few apps/sites I like to use to get my life together. I know that it’s helped me greatly once I started using them and allowed to find a sense of routine as well, even if the days and routine aren’t packed. Of course, everyone is different and if you try out any of these, you may find that it works or maybe it doesn’t. But remember, productivity does not equate to your worth. Resting and taking care of your health is being productive too. But if I’ve introduced/encouraged you to a way (or ways) to organise your life too then I hope they help you as well!
So, three grueling years at SOAS University of London have come to an end. It’s bittersweet at times, but nostalgia is already setting in as I recall my time at this university, an institution wedged between the legacies of well-known prestigious names. As I write this, I’m feeling both ecstatic and exhausted. I’m ecstatic because I graduated with a good degree classification. But I’m exhausted from three years of studying and dealing with mental health issues.
Perhaps the title appears to be extravagant, but after submitting my final exam, I couldn’t help but feel emotional that three years of my undergraduate degree were finally over. I suppose this post is a recollection of all the ups and downs of university life, and how coming to SOAS both changed me and made me realize how terrible the world truly is.
Coming To The School of Oriental and African Studies
Entrance to SOAS, the Main Building and the Brunei Gallery visible
How I discovered and came to SOAS in the first place is a story I’ve told a few people. In 2017, there was a UCAS exhibition in Bath, Somerset and our college took a trip to go visit as an aid to our impending applications. At the time, I had no idea what degree I wanted to pursue, let alone which university I wanted to attend. As a young adolescent, I had strong desires to live and study in New York City. But, clearly, my younger self didn’t realize how lofty and unrealistic those goals were for someone who barely made it through high school. l chose journalism because I wanted to write.
I told the university representatives that I wanted to study journalism as soon as we arrived and there were plenty of stalls to look around in an enormous hall. I noticed a SOAS stall and was immediately drawn in by the board with the yellow and red colours and a Maya Angelou art work. Unfortunately, I did not have time to speak with the reps, but I did obtain a prospectus, which I still have today.
On the coach ride back to our sixth form, I read through the SOAS University of London prospectus and was astonished. Genuinely astonished. The refreshing variety of courses, the university being located in the heart of London and the appreciation of diversity and non-Western languages and cultures was something I had never seen before in any other institution. Flicking through the pages detailing each department and course, I found History of Art. Despite initially settling on journalism, my interest in this field was piqued and I eventually settled on this degree. I also found it would still be useful if I wanted to become a journalist, instead of going down the conventional route of completing a journalism degree.
In October 2017, after I had applied for most universities (including Leeds, UCL, York and Manchester), my Dad and I travelled to London for SOAS’ Open Day. It was a new experience having to manoeuvre through Central London roads and having to pay a high amount for parking. But alas, we turned up to the campus and had a tour as well as go to the welcome talk in the Brunei Gallery. I also met one of my lecturers for the first time. I left for home that day feeling a surge in excitement to become a part of this community because that’s the vibe I experienced visiting the school in person.
By summer of 2018, I was anxiously awaiting results and booked a room at Dinwiddy House in Central London, one of the student accommodations available for SOAS students. In hindsight, having to book a place to stay before I received my results sounds rather stupid. Nonetheless, I ended up seeing my results while on a ferry to the Isles of Scilly with the UCAS page informing that I had my place at SOAS and Leeds confirmed! Of course, I decided to settle on SOAS as I literally worked towards attending this university. My actual grades were sent to me by one of my best friends who collected them on my behalf. Thus, I began a new journey and the anticipation was off the charts.
Three Years at SOAS
Entrance to the Main Building, the title of the school visible
SOAS as an institution proved to be one-of-a-kind in that they value changing the world with implementation of discourses surrounding various socio-political issues and having the courage to challenge the school itself in their wrongdoings. It’s admirable and comes from a place of concern with no room for passivity. There were strikes, sit-outs, campaigns, petitions, protests and any other active measures to call for these changes. Prior to attending SOAS, I was admittedly an unfortunate apathetic individual who tried to learn more but was both misinformed and eventually thought of politics as a bore.
Although my degree did not constitute political discussions besides religious discourse for the Islamic art modules, I’ve come to hear more perspectives and gained knowledge in a multitude of areas. The beauty of this is that the ways in which the world works and the shifting ideas are now understood. This wouldn’t have been possible if I had continued to remain in the stronghold familiar people have imposed on me throughout the years. Freedom at university made way for my mind to enter an intellectual map and the discoveries have been necessary. To listen is a crucial action which has become a part of my daily cognitive adventures. Being at SOAS has also taught me to fight and take activism seriously and although I’m still growing in this sector, I’m very glad that I’m changing to be better as a human being.
Regarding the social life at SOAS, I was blessed to have met a number of amazing people who’ve become such lights in my life. The day I moved into Dinwiddy House, I met some lovely girls who I spoke to in person for the first time and during freshers’ week I had the opportunity to meet fellow course mates and we all spent time together attending events. My wonderful flatmates across first and second years were a joy to live with and I’m glad we became a little family for the short time we had and I love that we’re still in contact and friends <3. Despite COVID-19 ending our residency together in second year, I’ll always cherish the homely vibes we all shared. My course mates have also been an absolute pleasure to study with. The chill vibes during lectures and tutorials to the hectic last-minute revision sessions during exam season at uni or on Skype. It was an honour to graduate beside some of you and I’m wishing those of you who are spending much needed extra time to finish work all the best!
The numerous societies were daunting but during freshers’ week in first year, I signed up to many believing this day to be the start of my life coming together. Alas, I did not attend a single society meeting in first year for reasons I’m not sure but most likely due to mental health. Second year saw me signing up to more societies but in the end, I attended one meeting for debate society. This year in particular saw a lot of my mental health issues become worse to the point where my days were spent inside my room in Dinwiddy and I barely attended lectures and even go outside to just chill and explore London. Plenty of times have I wished I could travel back in time and redo those months. Regardless, the times I did spend with friends and enjoy London, I’ll always look back on fondly. Third year being online did not hinder my social experience with people at SOAS. I’ve had the absolute privilege of knowing a group of people who I’ve spent many nights playing games, talking with on Zoom and chatting away on Whatsapp. Other societies have been fantastic in hosting online events and they’ve been so much fun! Thank you all for making my last year amazing despite the circumstances.
History of Art has been a very fascinating and enriching degree. As someone who wasn’t familiar with this academic discipline prior to starting university, I was relieved of course that many others weren’t either and we took on three years learning new ideas, approaches, theories and various regional arts and architecture. I’ve had the enjoyment of analysing the arts of East Asia, Islamic art and architecture and cultural theory. I’m still keen on studying further in my personal time and now as I embark on building my career in journalism, I feel more culturally and artistically aware to write about this field.
Post Graduation Thoughts
by the SOAS letters on the day of celebrations! :’)
On the day of our department’s end of year celebrations, I was feeling rather overwhelmed with emotions. As I saw course mates, lecturers and other department staff and looking at the campus buildings, it felt surreal that three years had passed by. I’ll always be grateful that I had the opportunity to come along to the heart of London and study at SOAS. I’ll always be grateful to have been amongst such a beautiful community that has inspired and shaped me going into the big, wide world in the present time. If there ever arises another opportunity to come to SOAS, if not for a masters degree, I would take that in a heartbeat.
Thank you SOAS, may you continue to inspire and also continue to change as a result of the generation of warriors who are fighting for a better world.
Hello everyone, and welcome back to my blog! This month has been both hectic and agonizing. What’s the reason? Finals! But now that I only have one more exam and a week off, I’ve been trying to take care of myself. It was critical that I did so because I was feeling very isolated and having mental breakdowns, neither of which is good for my mind. Health is a top priority for me, and one way I’ve been helping my mind is by surrounding myself with great content. Since I am constantly on my laptop, I might as well try to make that habit meaningful rather than leaving it open, wasting battery power and straining my eyes. I’ll be giving a tour on all of the things mentioned in the title: coping mechanisms and support systems in the form of media that reminds us of the joys in life ~
YouTube
During quarantine last year, I discovered a few lifestyle channels that produce weekly vlogs, and they have been a great source of comfort as well as inspiration! From days/weeks in their lives to room tours, these people’s creativity and bright personalities have earned them a growing fan base, and rightfully so! Here are the channels I absolutely adore:
Nayna Florence
Nayna is a third-year economics student from London who attends the University of Edinburgh. She uploads vlogs every Sunday, is a vegan, and promotes sustainability on her YouTube and Instagram accounts. Her promotion of these in her videos has been extremely beneficial in understanding that lifestyle. It has also encouraged me to try to do this with my food consumption and clothing purchases/wearing. Her vlogs are both relaxed and adventurous at times. Even though I’ve only been to Edinburgh once, I’ve seen more of the city and all that it has to offer as a result!
Moya is a content creator I discovered by chance, and I was surprised to learn that she was also studying art history! She is truly one of the sweetest people I’ve seen on the platform, and her videos have brought me a lot of hope and peace on late Sundays. Her videos have a certain charm to them, reminiscent of a coming-of-age film, as she documented her life in Dublin in her eponymous ‘Dublin Diaries’ vlog series (which are now over since she has finished university). But I’m excited to see what her future videos bring, and I have no doubt they’ll be amazing! P.S. Her fashion sense is also impeccable.
Leah Wei is a Canadian content creator and artist based in Montreal who produces a series of vlogs called ‘Adulting Diaries,’ among others. I gained a better understanding of veganism, spirituality, and yoga through her videos, despite the fact that I do not practice these myself. I also enjoy her videos in which she tries to speak only in French, which her boyfriend speaks fluently, and in which she tries to be trilingual in English, French, and Chinese. It rekindled my interest in language learning, and watching her vlogs helped me understand how to incorporate it into my daily life. Her creativity is also admirable, as she is a design graduate who also owns her own shop!
A whole web series has its own category. Invincible was a series that I had seen a teaser trailer for several months ago, but unfortunately forgot about soon after for no reason. It wasn’t until I saw KSI’s Instagram story of his finishing the first season and talking about how amazing it is, that I remembered. Since it is an Amazon Prime Original, and I do have Prime myself, I thought I’d give it a go. Verdict? IT WAS AMAZING!
As someone who enjoys the superhero genre (when done properly), this was a perfect blend of subversion and a nod to the genre’s humble beginnings. With a compelling narrative and a cast of complex and interesting characters, all of whom are voiced by well-known and talented actors, it’s no surprise that this series is already a fan favourite. It should be noted that the series has already produced at least two meme formats, which is impressive. If you haven’t seen it yet, I highly recommend you do so! But be warned: there’s a lot of no-holds-barred violence and gore!
Music
I was struck by a wave of nostalgia and decided to listen to some tunes from the 1990s and early 2000s. I decided to compile a playlist of songs that encapsulated the warm summers of that era. Selena has been an artist I’ve been aware of for a few years but had never properly listened to until this year. Three of her songs, ‘Como La Flor,’ ‘Amor Prohibido,’ and ‘Bidi Bidi Bom Bom,’ have kept me in a good mood during finals season. It breaks my heart that she died so young, but it also warms my heart that many of us can still listen to her music and carry on her legacy. Some of the other songs are straight from my childhood, and I just want to cherish them as much as possible.
As I clarified in my previous post, now that I’m no longer a member of the “born in the wrong generation” crowd, I’ve returned to unapologetically listening to mainstream pop songs. I’m not sure why I thought it was a bad idea because they’re just entertaining to listen to. Of all places, TikTok has reintroduced me to a few songs. There’s not much else to say except that I’m glad I can listen to whatever I want now.
That’s all there is to it, folks. These are some of my personal favourites! Of course, as I’ll be a free woman in the coming months, if I discover (or re-discover) anything else, I’ll write updated posts with any new favourites in each category. I’m excited to be able to explore and spend more time immersing myself in new content of all kinds! You’re welcome if anything in this post was introduced to you for the first time and you enjoyed it 🙂
So this blog has had its fair share of inactive periods and that is something that I cannot be proud of. But as an individual who struggles with multiple facets of life, including mental health, I say I needed the long break. Taking a trip through my blog from the very beginning was sort of strange and cringe-inducing but I’m also happy that I have grown as a person and improved in writing. Those posts will remain but I’m content with my decision to shift to different content that will perhaps be far more entertaining to read.
Recently, and I mean since perhaps the end of 2019, I have rekindled my love for film which never should have been put out in the first place. I also started realising what I truly desired to do once I wrap up this final phase of education and that is to write on film, pop culture and I suppose entertainment in general. If I may fulfil my ambitions to become a film journalist then that will be a delight. Mental health really was an issue towards the end of that year and I would spend nights snuggled under the duvet in my dorm in London, browsing through Netflix on any films to watch. By that point I had watched a few titles that have been on my watchlist for years.
However, since the beginning of 2020, prior to the global pandemic courtesy of COVID-19, I began using Letterboxd on the recommendation of a good friend and I must say, it has quite literally been life-changing. Tracking every film, giving star ratings out of 5 and writing a mix of serious film critic or quirky film student reviews kind of absorbed some of my time instead of focusing on assignments. But as with most forms of procrastination, this too is a lot of fun and certainly euphoric. Currently, as of writing this blog entry, my favourite films are Scarface (1983) and Donnie Darko (2001) and if you haven’t watched either, I’d highly recommend you do so. You can also find my Letterboxd here! (Shameless self-promo, sorry not sorry.)
Additionally, I have been expanding my music tastes and find myself on Spotify for several hours each day. I suppose most people do but as someone who’s interests in music have been very iffy over the years because I felt indecisive or forayed into the messy “I was born in the wrong generation” crowd, it has been liberating to finally just sit down and listen to anything I pleased. Multiple playlists and exploration of various genres later, I am having the time of my life jamming to my aww yeah! playlist or imagining I am the protagonist of a coming-of-age film with my art hoe / vsco ! playlist to name a few.
There isn’t much else to write in this short update but I do hope that it’s served as a teaser of some sorts for future posts and I, for one, am very excited for the content I will publish for you all to read! The name is basically a reference to the fact that I can cry a lot and I’m also desi (South Asian). For now, stay safe, follow the rules for the pandemic and take care of your loved ones and yourselves!
I am finally back on this blog, rebranded (at least for now) and ready to take on the world!
I wanted to share something that is very important to me and others too in fact because it has changed my life in more ways than one. Instagram has already seen my post and caption in partnership with Made of Millions. But I figured I should delve a bit more into my story. So here we go, this is the story of my long struggle with obsessive-compulsive disorder and why it needs to be understood better and why sufferers deserve all the help and love they need.
I won’t lie, I used to believe that OCD was just a thing where you want things arranged neatly or in order, tidiness and perfection being the main components. The first time I had heard of the term “OCD” was actually on Disney Channel. Being a young impressionable teenager, I assumed this was true and joined the masses who thought of OCD as a quirk. “I’m so OCD” or “My OCD is not liking this” and other similar phrases are thrown around like it doesn’t mean much. Well, it clearly isn’t anything like the misconceptions portrayed in the media and propagated by the general public. OCD in reality consists of intrusive thoughts that cause great anxiety and then a performance of compulsions to provide relief, though temporary.
I have been getting intrusive thoughts since I was a child, though I did not know it had anything to do with a mental illness. Harming others, people I know in person or even celebrities doing things that are inappropriate, family members doing something strange were the themes and caused me to be upset. But back in those days, I didn’t think too much of them and was able to move on in life with some ease. It wasn’t until the late summer of 2018 that the symptoms developed into something worse. That summer was comprised of anxiety over A-Level results and acceptance into university but also some great memories with friends and family. A holiday in August of that year was a good time of relaxation and where I received my results (spoiler: I got the grades I worked for and was accepted into my first-choice university). So nothing could go wrong from that point, right? Wrong. Returning home and then the subsequent days changed my life forever. Thoughts of a sexual nature of a child I know well and think of as a little sister plagued my brain and would not leave. I cried every day and lived in fear that I was slowly becoming a deviant, something I’m definitely against. So why was I having these thoughts? After doing the traditional search on Google for answers, I did come across users on forums who experienced the same symptoms and that was some reassurance that I was not alone. OCD appeared by name and this is where I began to understand what it truly is. But that obviously did not stop the thoughts from making regular appearances in my mind.
In September of that year, I moved to university for my first year and this was a period where I felt the thoughts were disappearing and I would be fine once again. New friends, flatmates and the exciting life in a big city and at university were proving to be a good distraction and a reminder that life doesn’t have to change, I’m still me. But with any illness comes relapses and that’s exactly what happened with myself. I sought counselling with the student services at university which was helpful but once again, that wasn’t enough. During my second term, sleep became an issue and I was not attending lectures and tutorials regularly. It was hopeless.
By the end of my first year, I sought out counselling again and this time I was urged to visit a doctor and seek professional help. I’m not sure why I didn’t do so sooner but the thoughts of stigma, fear of explaining my thoughts and family perhaps prevented me. I was able to do my exams and life started to look brighter again too. Despite it being the summer and it was close to return home for the holidays, I went to my GP and lifted a huge burden from my shoulders. I spoke to my psychiatrist for the first time on the phone and we arranged to meet once I returned to university. Fast forward to October 2019 and we meet in person for the first time and I proceeded to tell him everything. That was when he officially diagnosed me with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, I had my suspicions but didn’t want to self-diagnose but this was the confirmation. I began taking medication and also saw a counsellor again.
Since then until now, I have had many relapses that had me bed-ridden, unable to attend classes and go outside. Literally, I have attended only a handful this whole academic year! With COVID-19 it was also cut short and meant I had to return home, with no updated batch of medication and in an environment I’m not comfortable in. I have been through many extreme periods of darkness, contemplating suicide and even writing a final note. But I’m fighting and with everything I have been through these last nearly 3 years, I suppose I am a fighter after all. There is still a long way to go as I’m waiting for therapy (CBT) but I’m continuing. I’m determined to make my life great again and take back myself, and I sure want this to be the case for everyone else who has OCD.
The reality of OCD is dark. The thoughts we get range from a variety of themes such as harm/violence, sexuality or sexual deviance, existentialism, health and even incest. So you should see now that there isn’t really anything to do with tidying up. Even if there was an involvement of cleanliness, it would be doing so because if you didn’t, something terrible would happen to your family. To give you an honest representation of thoughts in OCD, here are some examples:
If I am using a knife in the kitchen while my mum is next to me, I could stab her to death.
I picked up the child for too long, what if I molested them?
I didn’t wash my hands properly/several times, I’m going to get a disease.
These thoughts can also occur at the most random, or inappropriate moments such as during family/public gatherings, sexual intimacy, meetings/interviews, funerals, weddings etc. Thoughts aren’t the only symptom either, OCD comes with physical sensations, urges/impulses too which causes further suffering. OCD does not care, it just wants to torment you. No one told me that OCD was an enemy living inside my own head.
The stigma surrounding the disorder is so great as has been established. This then contributes to individuals to not seek professional help out of fear, guilt, shame or misunderstanding. It is so crucial that OCD is recognised as a genuine illness and what the symptoms are to break this stigma. Then sufferers such as myself could have been treated much earlier and not suffer in silence for years. I hope the awareness that is brought will change how OCD is perceived. Chrissie Hodges is a great individual who accomplishes this on her YouTube channel and Instagram page. The organisation Made of Millions (who I have partnered with in sharing my story) strive to do so as well. Please check them out!
Thank you for reading, I do hope you are now aware of what OCD is and if you suffer from it yourself, that you know you aren’t alone. Also a special thank you to Made of Millions for encouraging and sharing our stories for their campaign #NoOneToldMe.
Take care of yourselves 🙂
It takes an average of 10 years for a person suffering from a psychiatric disorder to seek help. Half of which start before the age of 14. Each year spent suffering in silence, is a year lost.
This #mentalhealthawarenessmonth, I’m proud to partner with @madeofmillions_ for their #NoOneToldMe campaign focused on bringing awareness to the treatment gap — the long, avoidable years so many of us spend suffering in silence. Learn more at madeofmillions.com. If you’re in the U.S. and experiencing a crisis, text MADE to 741741 for free, 24/7 support.
So I’m nearing the end of my first year at university and once I finish my final exam, I can start packing and return home. Looking back, it has been a strange year. Before I moved into my halls, the feelings that coursed through my body were of excitement and joy, I couldn’t wait to start university.
Fast forward to December 2018 and I am in a messy state of anxiety and depression. Why did i become like this? The work I had to complete took a large toll on me. I was lonely with barely anyone to talk to or interact with and that was also partly due to my lack of social skills/anxiety. I didn’t feel as if i could approach anyone. My health plummeted so much that I ended up skipping lectures and tutorials because I just couldn’t get up out of bed. Not only that, my sleep cycle has very much been destroyed with irregular sleeping patterns. Despite speaking to my lecturer about my problems and attending counselling session, I felt as if I was a lost cause.
Now, as of May 2019, i still very much feel the same if not worse. I barely ever had breakfast. Once again, I skipped lectures and tutorials because I was ill. I was terrified of my assignment results but thankfully, I pulled through with some firsts. I have been anxious throughout this exam season and am anxious for exam results. I feel like a disappointment to my family for spending so much of their money and a disappointment to myself: that no matter how much I try I never seem to get better. I cried so much for days, feeling hopeless about whether I’ll ever feel good like my past self. Thoughts of me being dead entered my mind too…all of these exhibit my mental and physical state throughout this year and it makes me shed more tears. These past few days, I have experienced some joy thanks to the lovely people I have met this year. But now, as I’m writing this post, I have gone back to the same gloomy girl with no energy or desire and a puddle of tears, a shell of my former self. But this is nobody’s fault and it’s not mine either.
I’m awaiting the future where i will get help and this is something I encourage others to do as well. I’m working so hard to become better again and that is a promise I make to myself and my loved ones. Everyone goes through difficult times at university and I wanted to share my experiences.
cinem(a)shika. 